Today pretty much rocked and blew at the same time. How in the heck is that possible?
Well, allow me to divulge. I'm currently at a crossroads. Many post grads can empathize with my situation: where do I go from here? That's exactly what I wonder every day. Being in your 20s means you want results and you want them now damnit! Unfortunately things don't always pan out that way, sometimes you just have to wait. After all everyone and their mom says good things happen to those who wait. I have a SEVERE problem with this. I consider myself a "get em' girl", everything I want I work damn hard for. I practically have tunnel vision for it until I get it. Granted sometimes it means being a bear/workaholic and hibernating into my work but it always pays off. My problem is I can't just stand by and wait for other people to make decisions on me. I've been interviewing at various TV stations and publications. Things seem so far so good. I may be on a good track, but the waiting is killing me! Do I have the position...do I not? It's important for me to be proactive in chasing my dream. If I slack I know I'll get comfortable in a job I have NO interest in and pushed around by all sorts of people. I can deal with authority, but it would be way too difficult dealing with it at a Target. I'm ready to pour myself into my work, not having to sometimes stifle my opinion or suggestions because I'm not a boss. One minute I'm told to speak up, that's what leaders do and the next I'm being shushed because I should just agree. Uhhh what? Is this a rat race? Am I going nowhere? So in a nutshell, I'm going for it. I'm going to do what I truly want to do. My career will be what I want it to be. I'd rather stress over something I hold a passion for than never feel it because I never pursued my goals. It's about how I'll feel about myself later in life. What is most fulfilling? Like many femme fatales in classic film noirs I'll spearhead towards my dream and work the different routes to it. It may be hard, but I've proven myself to MYSELF. It'd be much better to be damned for doing than dead with regrets. With this mindset how can you lose?
